You know what happens when someone does something and it turns out quite well for them? That’s right, they invariably turn around and do it all over again. The self-contained disciplinarian who can restrain themselves and simply stick will always be outweighed by the success hungry achiever, who thinks, ‘Well, there’s clearly a market out there…’ Show me a John Cleese who made 12 episodes of Fawlty Towers and then just stopped and I’ll show you a thousand Jennifer Saunders who pops back into the Absolutely Fabulous universe about as often as John Farnham embarks on a farewell tour.
At least that’s the conventional wisdom…
But let’s dig a little deeper, shall we? First, too much Absolutely Fabulous is never enough, so there are plenty of folk holding out for the episodes with Edina and Patsy kicking up a storm and knocking back the Bolly while leaning on their zimmer frames. And second, yes, Cleese may have made only 12 episodes, but what many people forget is there were actually two series of six episodes each. So even the great Python himself went back to the well at least once.
What does all this have to do with Apple, I hear you ask? Ah, yes, we’re getting to that. Our first rumour this week is courtesy of Morgan Stanley’s Katy Huberty (and try saying that delightful name without smiling). Happity Hoppity Huberty has been chatting to Tim Cook and Peter Oppenheimer and, following their cosy firesides, is telling the world that she reckons the ‘two phones at a pop’ concept has been such a hit for Apple, Tim and Pete are going to adopt it as an ongoing policy.
As reported by AppleInsider, “Huberty believes Apple is now primed for ‘multiple refreshes per year’ of the popular device, akin to the twin launches of iPad 3 and iPad 4 in 2012.”
So twice as many launch parties a year then? Excellent! Any excuse for another round of beluga and smoked salmon nibbly things, we say…
Champas all right with you, Pats?
And while we’ve got the nibblies out, let’s raise a glass to the iPad Air profit margins. Arstechnica and the ever knowledgeable AllThingsD think we should. Both websites this week referenced a report by IHS iSuppli, explaining a teardown analysis of the newest tablet. The upshot? It seems that all the upgrades and fancy pants features of the iPad Air have been accomplished at rock bottom prices. At least, by Apple standards. The word is, reversing every trend in the history of the universe*, the tablet’s manufacturing costs have actually decreased. It now costs somewhere between $288 and $379 to produce, and sells for between $598 and $1049 to buy, meaning there’s a great whopping profit margin starting at around 48 percent.
Forty-eight percent pure profit! Forget the Bolly sweetie, break out the Krug.
Get ready for this, sweetie
Of course, it’s not all about cash**, benchmark shredding is very important too, of course. And that’s why MacDailyNews is currently a little bit excited about the forthcoming Mac Pro. Using some brilliant analysis/wild guesses, John Poole from Primate Labs has put together the processors he “expects to see” in the upcoming Mac Pro. “Since Geekbench 3 is a cross-platform benchmark, we can estimate the missing Mac Pro scores using results from Windows workstations that use the same processors as the Mac Pros,” says Poole. Guess it’s the brilliant analysis option then, despite the, er, cheeky rejoinder from Breeze in the comments. You can get your head around Poole’s figures here.
I don’t want more choice. I just want nicer things.
Can this be? Is it really a week without a good old iWatch rumour to keep us amused? No, of course not. Don’t be ridiculous. Do you really think the absence of anything about the actual fact of such a beast, or even the sniff of a rumour of the existence of such a beast, would deter the bloggers who thrive on this stuff? We should say not; they simply write pieces about how a hypothetical smartwatch courtesy of Apple would be much, much more popular than the no longer hypothetical Google glass. Easy! And if you build it, they will come. Or if you write it, they will click on it. Hell, we did. Thanks for nothing MacDailyNews.
Time for another little drinkie before we go?
And finally some interest piquing news for all those north of the Apple border. Or, as we like to call them, Canadians. Bloor Street is one of the main streets in lovely old Toronto town and an imminent retail vacancy on a prominent corner has set one developer’s heart a flutter.
Ifoapple.store.com has published a couple of renderings in a lease promotion for 100 Bloor Street West – a 26-storey building with three large ground floor retail spaces that have recently become available. The renderings feature the Apple logo and a couple of different concepts of what the space would look like if Apple moved in. But perhaps it’s all just wishful thinking…
You see, there’s actually already an Apple store on Yonge Street (one of the metropolis’ other main thoroughfares), which actually crosses Bloor. Though as we always like to say, ‘You can never have enough hats, gloves, shoes or Apple stores…’
And that’s the Rumour Mill for the week ending 8 November 2013. Bottoms up, sweetie.
* complete and utter hyperbole.
** yes, it is.